Saturday, November 22, 2008

Maria

Maria threw darts at maps and traveled the globe, and depended on the kindness of strangers but slept with a machete just in case. She lived in places and ways that seem unreal and found a way to scratch a full life out of wherever she happened to be. She lived bravely and with conviction and determination. She had a wild mane of black hair and a beauty both striking and serene. When she moved to a remote plain in Idaho, it was no surprise that she lived "off the grid" as in all the stories I heard about her, she had never lived "on" the grid. When she was diagnosed with breast cancer nearly two years ago, I remember hearing that she had felt it even earlier than that but didn't have insurance. Although the news initially saw her declaring she would go quietly into that night and refuse treatment, she actually ended up defying the odds so many times that I lost count as she rallied from hospice and returned home after she was given weeks and hours to live over and over again. It was a long and painful goodbye for her and her family but the family was able to rally around to see her, laugh, cry, and try to say something like goodbye. If you believe that God ultimately keeps the time on our stay here then she wasn't here a moment longer than we all needed her to be and her life continues in her frighteningly beautiful daughter and two handsome boys. I hope for her passing to imbue them with that same steel rod of determination to live and push through things and that her loss will give them a well of strength they can draw from and remember her as the source of. I never met her in person, never even spoke to her, but I still can't believe she isn't here anymore. My dear friend is grieving her, the one who told me everything I know about her sister Maria, who finally laid down her head to rest on Saturday November 15th, 2008.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Please tell your friend that I am so sorry.

Anonymous said...

My deepest sympathy. I thought your comment, "If you believe that God ultimately keeps the time on our stay here then she wasn't here a moment longer than we all needed her to be" was beautiful and I plan to remember and use it for comfort in my times of loss.